I am really bad at this aren't I.

I am feeling very morose at the moment.  Work dramas, family dramas, meh!

My new latest obsession Woogsworld via SawHole her ever able assistant has provoked me into action...

So here goes.

My earliest memory is my parents making me stand on the steps of a plane on Brampton Island for a photo and petrified it was going to take off with me standing there.

At school I was constantly in teased for being fat.  If only I was that fat now...

My first relationship was with the very dodgy guy around the corner who had an even dodgier brother that is probably now locked up as a sex offender....

I don't like talking about other peoples problems

My most treasured possession is my children of course *snort*  or my numerous signed powderfinger merchandise

My parents always told me stop teasing your brother 

I wish I had been more active as a teenager/adult

I wish I hadn't let people walk all over me and be my own person... and NOT  go out with my first boyfriend at all let alone for 3 years.  I should have kicked him to the curb the minute he told me "i'd go out with you if you lost weight"

My most humiliating moment was pinching my prac supervisor on the bum when I thought it was someone else.  Still makes me cringe 12 years later!

My happiest moments were meeting powderfinger for the first time, my children being born, natch

At home I cook very little!

My last meal would be green chicken curry from chop chop in Flemington in Melbourne.  Best. Ever. Mouth is watering just thinking about it.


I'm very bad at housewifery, hiding my disdain, BLOGGING!

If I wasn't me I'd like to be BabyMac or a professional groupie a'la Penny Lane in Almost Famous!

The last big belly laugh I had was lately, I cant remember.  oh wait, yes I do... out to dinner with friends and my rock bitch Dave trying to sneak out a fart and it turns out to be the loudest, most rank sounding fart EVER.  epic fail... but my god, I even think I snorted.

When I was a child I wanted to be a teacher!  So I guess I should be happy that I have reached my goal then huh???  hmmmm

The book that changed my life Forever, Judy Blume. 

It's not fashionable, but I dont give a shit!  I like to look nice at the right occasion, but on the weekend... meh.

Friends say I am cranky, intolerant but mildly amusing.

The song I'd like played at my funeral is nothing by powderfinger... just to surprise people!!!

My greatest fear is my kids growing up without me.... not that I think I am mother of the year, cough but it would make me sad if they didn't have their mum.  I know I would be if I lost my mum.

At the moment I'm reading nothing... who has time for reading when there are blogs to be read!  haha

At the moment I'm listening to my husband blowing his nose about 10 times.  ugh.

If only I could lose 60 kgs right now.  Just for 5 minutes.  Then I would know what it was like and I would be enthused to do it the hard way.  

The hardest thing I've ever done push out two babies... at different times!

What I don't find amusing is people who think they are owed a living, or the world revolves round them and their issues.

I'm always being asked - "mum!  look!" and then jibberish.  ad nausea, multiple times per hour, per day, per week.

Cat or Dog? Both.  We currently have a dog, but only because I had never had a dog and wanted to try it.  I think i prefer a cat!

My worst job was delivering pizzas

I wonder if I will ever get this blogging thing going!!!

Blockers

I had to go back to work today for a PD (Professional Development) which in short is how we teachers learn new stuff.  Some of them can be a complete and utter waste of time.  I have been to PLENTY of those.  Here in the ACT, teachers have to do their PD in stand down (wanky term for holidays).  In NSW, they have pupil free days, which are usually the first day back after holidays.  But here in the 'berra, as part of our EBA, ours are during 'stand down'.  I remember once getting in big trouble for calling holidays 'holidays'. 

"No Deborah (this bitch always called me Deborah, I fucking hated her)  It's called stand down."

fuck her.  It's holidays.  STFU.

Anyhoo, we had one of those today.  It was REALLY good.  REALLY useful for what we as a school can do moving forward.  Everyone is on board and excited about this way of doing things.

Except one.

There is always one.  Always one who disagrees with everything, everyone and every idea.  Just because they can. 

This woman, who is as sour as spoilt milk and has a permanent cats bum face.  She is the same age as me but looks 20 years older.  Here's an example of her foolery, and I am paraphrasing because if I were to go word for word, I would be here a week.

This PD was about developing a school process that everyone can follow so we are all on the same page about what we as a staff see teaching and learning.  Part of this ongoing PD is a section where the PARENT COMMUNITY (so not teachers, unless they want to) are going to be contributing to the plan of the school.  It is to be held after school (which was clearly marked on the sheet we were reading, as well as it being clearly marked as being FOR THE COMMUNITY)  This one puts up her hand.  She also speaks with a put on lisp when she is particularly being a douche nugget.

"well, I already see a problem, me, being a single parent, can see an issue with me having to be here after school"

Blocker.  Instantly.  before even finding out what was entailed AND IGNORING WHAT WAS STATED ON THE SHEET!

Now, I could be completely factitious and outline this woman's personal issues as well as her professional ones.  But I wont.  Needless to say, she is the most vapid, annoying, waste of space I have ever come across. 

argh.

I just had to get that off my chest. 

Right. Over that.

Inspired by the very awesome Retro Mummy, I am turning over a new leaf and giving you...

10 things you don't know about me!

(and considering none of you know me, then this is going to be new for everyone!  yay!  Let's play.

1.  I was born in Melbourne, but call Canberra home.  I could live in Melbourne again, but I'd want to live in the inner city!  And who can afford that? 
2.  My husband is 8 years younger than me.
3.  I am the worlds worst housewife.  ever.  full stop.  no contest.  move along
4.  I despise people who pretend to be someone they are not.  You aren't fooling anyone, get over yourself.
5.  I still don't think I know who I am, even at 38.
6.  If I could have my life over again, there are a MOUNTAIN of things I would do differently, but having said that, they are not regrets, but just lessons learned.
7.  I am what doctors call morbidly obese and I hate that... part of the lessons learned.  I would be more active in my youth and not sit on my arse as much.
8.  I want to go to Thailand for my 40th... which is only 2 years away!  When did that happen!?!
9.  I don't suffer fools gladly... in fact, not at all.  I find it hard to hide my disdain to people who are idiots.
10.  I have Bernard Fanning's phone number but I will never ever use it. 

Your turn!

ok, so that might have been a tad dramatic.

I am currently menstrual.  That might explain my current malaise.  I get very angry just before my period and then BAM, back to normal.  It's not to say these things are not issues, they are (and need to be addressed before the rot sets it) but they seem insurmountable at this time of the month.  Oh. and did I mention I turned 38 yesterday.

'nuff said.

so, in order to restore some faith in myself that its ok, I'm ok and the universe is ok, I am going to outline 5 things that make me happy.

1. ..................... ummm....... ahhhh.....

geeez, this is harder than I thought.  I fully can't think of one thing.

fuck it, I'll have a beer instead.

gotta get my mojo back

I am in a rut in a major way.  Not just with the whole blogging thing, that is blatantly obvious.  Just life in general.  I dead set determined it's because of the weather.  Who wants to do anything in this miserable cold weather.

I would much rather be somewhere like here...

But that aint gonna happen anytime soon. Not like I would want to sit in a bikini in a pool either.  But that's another story.

I'm also in a relationship rut.  I can feel the tension with hubby.  It is a physical presence at the moment and I don't know what to do to fix it.  I try to speak to him about it, he either gets sooky or belligerent.  So I just withdraw and don't engage, which makes the chasm even bigger.

*sigh*

I'm also well and truly over school holidays.  A stay at home mum I am not.  I love my kids with every fibre of my being, but I also like that other people are around to help me raise them while I work.  I don't want to go back to work in the mood I am in.  Emmy sooks all day (terrible 2's come early), Lucy chatters about nonsense and tries to be a second mum.  Please tell me I am not the only one who at times, as bad as it sounds, cannot stand the sight or sounds of their kids!!!!

What to do...  this rut is doing my head in.  I don't want to be this person.

bad blogger

I am really good at starting things with gusto, and then failing miserably.

Here are a few examples, in no particular order...

- weightloss (on going and perpetually!)
- making beaded jewellery
- sewing
- going to the gym
- housework (same with weightloss, on going and perpetual!!!)
- and now blogging.

If only blogging could be done by tapping straight into my head.  I have lots of witty insightful goings on in my mind, its finding the time to sit down and type them out!

Possibly because I should be writing reports that I have resorted to blogging again!!

Woah, its been a while!

Very neglectful of me, but life has just gotten away from me since going back to work!

But as usual, Chantelle at FatMumSlim has given me some inspiration with her Point and Shoot.... plus I also had a pretty exciting weekend!

2 gigs down, 6 more to go.   The beginning of the end.... :(

Had a great weekend up in the Goldie and Brisvegas.  Didn't hurt that Riverfire was on at the same time, so we got fireworks to boot!  Not to mention F1-11 dump and burns.  Quite the evening in Brisbane, but it made for a very slow and tiring wait for a taxi that night!

I also got some new 'ink'.  I finally replicated the daughter tattoo so now Emily has one the same as Lucy on my inner ankle, plus just to add to the whole powderfinger experience, I got some lyrics on my back.

Haven't shown hubby this one yet....